Wednesday, August 03, 2005


Spoiled, rich bottle blondes who all look alike, with a combined IQ of about 12, saying like at least eleventy times in the same sentence, flipping their hair, and traipsing around Daddy's house for approximately 30 minutes every Tuesday night at 10. I'm so hooked. La la la Laguna!!! I LOVE Laguna Beach. I love watching a bunch of rich white high school kids that live on the other side of the country. These teens are so vapid they make Paris Hilton look like Socrates. I can't get enough of the drama that is Laguna Beach. Because I have no life out here in Grand Rapids, MI, I just live vicariously through my Laguna friends. I think I've broken half the Commandents watching this show. Thou shalt not covet (or something like that). Well let me tell you, I'm coveting LC's house like a mugghhh!! I'm coveting her wardrobe and her car too. It's not right that someone who can't even vote gets to wear clothes I can't even afford. Thou shalt not lust (is that one of them?). Well I'm lusting after that fine piece of white meat Stephen. Don't tell anyone I said this, but those pouty lips and that bird chest make me just a wee bit moist. Kristin and LC aren't the only ones that wanna tap that. Oh and before you say anything, that boy is 18 so that makes molesting him perfectly legal. Speaking of Kristin and LC, I just don't get why Stephen waffles between the two of them. Sure, Kristin is a "hot" party girl with big boobs and skirts shorter than the time it takes J Lo to get married and divorced, but LC would drink Stephen's bathwater. That's gotta count for something, right? LC has made staring longinly at a boy who doesn't want her into an artform. Let's applaud that woman! And much as I want to hate on her, I can't. Hell, I want to be her. That bitch has her own theme song ("we've got more bounce in California than all of ya'll combined...). How tight is that? I want my own theme song that'll play everywhere I go! She dumped Stephen cause she started dating someone else while they were still together, and dude still wants her. That chick must got gold b/w her legs cause that dude's whipped. Not to mention that this girl is dumber than rocks and still managed to make it to her senior year of high school. I'm in awe of her really.
Season 2 just started and I'm still getting used to the new cast members. Here's what I know so far. Casey's got more extensions than AT&T, but she lives in a phat ass crib. Jessica's nose is wide open over her boyfriend Jason who's trying to bang Alex M.'s back out. There are other folks who I can't remember right now, but I'll be sure to get to know them too. Stay tuned...

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