Are You For Real

In his ubiquitous hit song, "I Heard It Through the Grapevine," Marvin Gaye sang, "Believe maybe half of what you see and some to none of what you hear."  I think this lyric should be modified for MBA applicants who frequent b-school forums.  "Believe maybe half of what you see and some to none of what you read."  I've been an active participant on the GMAT Club forums for almost a year and if the site is representative of the applicant pool then I guess 90% of applicants have 740+ GMAT scores, 3.7 GPAs from top 10 schools, and all have stellar work experience.  It's easy to feel intimidated by the number of outstanding competition.  However, I'm starting to think that maybe some of those scary good competitors are of the boogie man under your bed variety.  They do not really exist.

Out of my Misery

I'll confess. I was getting worried.  Three weeks of invites had passed and my mailbox was conspicuously empty.  Well not empty, just lacking the right email: the invitation to interview at Wharton. According to GMAT Club, in the first two waves of invitations the only people to report receiving them were international and Lauder applicants.  In the third week the love got spread to the domestic applicants, but none toward me.  Although I felt that my Wharton application was my best one I still worried about getting an invite.  The applicant pool is ridiculously competitive and I know that there are people with better stats applying.  Seeing other people get their invites while I didn't reinforced these thoughts.  I know, I know, I know....I always say that being in the 1st wave (albeit domestic wave) isn't a big deal.  But I will admit that it's nice to be put out of your misery sooner rather than later.  Intellectually I knew that there was still plenty of time to receive the invite, but I will admit that my internal crazy did tick up a notch or two (maybe from a 2 to a 4).  I confided my worries to a few close friends and put on my best optimistic facade for everyone else.

Etiquette 101

It is no secret that I like to participate in online MBA forums.  GMAT Club is my favorite.  I think that these sites are great resources for finding information on everything from essays to interview questions.  I've even met some very cool people from the site with whom I am excited to potentially attend school.  But lately, GMAT Club has been getting on my last nerve.  Correction, some GMAT Club members have become as grating as nails on a chalk board.  After finding so much useful information from other posters I have done my best to pay it forward, answering questions about Kellogg's admissions process, giving advice on post-interview thank you notes, and sending words of encouragement to nervous posters.  However, in the last month or so my posts have taken a turn toward the bitchy.  Why? Has the pressure of R2 gotten to me, causing me to lash out at poor, unsuspecting posters?  Hmmm...not so much.  See the problem is not me, it's THEM.  Maybe I didn't see it in R1, but R2 has brought forth some of the least self-aware, most obnoxious personalities I've encountered online.

Stay Tuned

I've been wanting to update my blog for the last few weeks but have been uber busy.  There's a ton I want to get into, like my Booth interview, waiting on Wharton and Stanford invites, Day At Kellogg, and the craziness that is MBA forums.  I've been swamped with work and other stuff so I haven't had the time to sit down and write a proper entry.  Oh and I'll be working on a joint blog post with my good friend The Senator from GMAT Club.

I promise I will come back soon to share all of the details about DAK, Booth, and life very shortly.

Off to the Races

Let the speculation cease.  Since January 4 at  5:00 PM CST applicants to U of Chicago's Booth School of Business have been wondering when interview invitations would start.  An email sent to a limited number of applicants announced that invites would start on February 25, 2012.  The only problem with that info is that the mid decision deadline by which ALL interview invites (and outright rejections) would be announced is February 15, 2012.  Obviously, Feb. 25 is a typo.  But what's the real date?  Let the GMAT Club forums be set ablaze with theories.

ODE TO THE HATERS

To my sorority sister who told me that the Cowboys would beat the Giants in the regular season finale, I say, "SUCK IT!!'

To that Cowboys fan on facebook who said, "Good luck. U get the honor of losing in the first round," I say to you, "KISS KEVIN BOOTHE'S GIANT ASS!"

To falcondevil on GMATClub.com I say, "Two points? Really?! I'd respect your Falcons more if they'd simply goose egged."

To any and everyone who said the Packers would beat the Giants I say, "Your defense and O-Line are TRASH!! You Roger those SACKS Aaron?"

To my 2010, 2008, and 2003 neos who were talking all that shit about the 9ers knocking out my Giants I say, "The Giants shoved that candlestick up your ass!"

To Pats fans I say, "Ya'll don't want NONE of the GIANTS!  18-1, BITCHES!"

G-MEN

Am I Invited Too?

I have not worked on a b-school application in over a week.  Although I am finished with applications I am a long way from through with the application process.  I now await my fate with three schools: Wharton, Booth, and Stanford (California, you must be dreaming!).  Waiting on these schools is different than waiting on Kellogg because Kellogg allows applicants to initiate their interviews, but this second crop of schools handles this part much differently.  They have a don't call us, we'll call you policy.  So now I get to experience the b-school ritual of stressing over interview invites.  Yay for me! (?)

Consultation

I have a confession.  Two years ago I don't think that I was aware that the consulting industry existed.  MBB could have stood for Making Butts Bounce for all I knew.  I remember classmates in undergrad who recruited for Deloitte but for some reason I always thought they were going to do something related to finance or accounting.  I did not know that there were companies devoted to giving other companies advice (and pretty power point decks).  I learned about this wonderful world of frequent flyer miles, black suits, and power point prowess when I embarked upon the b-school path.  I briefly considered it as a potential post MBA career but immediately let the idea go upon hearing about the hours consultants worked.  I'm not built for 70-90 hour work weeks.  Once introduced to consulting I soon learned that there's a consultant for everything.  And when talking MBA there is none more prevalent than the admissions consultant.

Back to Life

On Wednesday January 11, 2012 at 7:42 PM EST I submitted the last business school application I will ever complete! Cue the "Hallelujah" music and release the doves! As God is my witness, I will never apply to b-school again!

Dramatic? Yes. Justified? Hell freaking yeah! As I come out of the fog that was application season, I realize that I have been at this MBA game in some way, shape, or form since January 2011 (actually August 2010, but not in earnest).  Hmm...let's see. It's January 2012 now, so that would be one full year of my life dedicated to getting my arse into school.  One year of GMAT studying, school research, essay writing, recommender prep, school visits, avoiding essays with hours of Bejeweled, and countless hours of worrying about NOT getting in.  Damn, that's a shitty way to spend an entire year.  Don't get me wrong, I am so glad that it all resulted in an admit (and hopefully a couple more), but on the real, I miss my life!  Like, my actual life.  I know this may be hard to believe because all I've talked about for the last year is applying to business school, but there is so much more to me than the pursuit of an MBA.  Not for nothing, but I am a kick ass chick and I really haven't kicked ass the way I like to kick ass all year.

One Down...

It's been 8 days, 12 hours and 22 minutes since I got the admit call from Kellogg.  I'm still walking on sunshine, but I've started to come down a bit from my euphoric high.  There are still Round 2 applications to complete (too many of them since I procrastinated through most of November and December).  What's that you say? Why am I applying in Round 2 if I'm already in at Kellogg?  Aren't I set on going to Kellogg?  Isn't Kellogg my first choice?

The simple answer to the last two questions is, no.  I'm not set on going to Kellogg and it's not my first choice.  However, I don't have a first choice.

Along the Yellow Brick Road.

When Dorothy got caught in a twister, hit her head, and woke up in Oz, she couldn't have fathomed the characters that she would meet along the way.  There was Glenda, the Good Witch of the North who gave her ruby slippers and gave her the simple instructions to, "follow the yellow brick road."  There were the Munchkins who welcomed her to Munchkin land.  And we must not forget the friends Dorothy made on her way to the Emerald City: Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Cowardly Lion.  All of these characters (including the Wicked Witch of the West) are instantly recognizable and I'm sure we could all identify them with either pieces of ourselves or people we know.

So along my personal yellow brick road to b-school, I too have come across a colorful cast of characters.  See if you recognize any of these people.

Walking on Sunshine

"I used to think maybe you loved me..."

I'll be honest. This summer when I was reseraching schools, Kellogg didn't really do it for me.  Maybe it was the staid website or possibly the "K is only good for marketing" chatter on the MBA forums. Whatever it was I didn't have the stars in my eyes for Kellogg that I did for Booth (SKI TRIP!), Wharton, Stanford, and other schools. Still, one of my recommenders is a Kellogg alum and I thought it would be stupid to not try to take some small advantage in that.

Something funny happens when you take the time to get to know a school in order to write three to four sentences to answer the all important question, "Why Kellogg." You find out exactly why. I spent hours poring over Kellogg's website, reading professors' blogs, checking out student clubs, and learning about the curriculum.  I spoke to current students too. Somewhere in the middle of writing the second essay it hit me: I would love to do all of the wonderful things I'm writing about. I want to enter the Net Impact case competition. I want to do a Global Immersion.  I want to be a Board Fellow. Oh CRAP! I want to go to Kellogg.

Sitting by the Phone

I know, I know, I know. I've been remiss with updating the blog. It's not that I haven't wanted to write an update; it's just that I can't quite justify writing a blog update when I should be using the time to write essays. Yep, that's right folks, I am now smack in the middle of applications. In fact I submitted my first application last month. That feeling of relief that supposedly comes with finally completing an application has yet to settle upon me. Instead, all I can feel is obsessive paranoia. See, it's out of my hands now. There's nothing more I can do to convince the admissions committee to let me in. The only thing left to do is wait. Wait and see if they like my GMAT score, optional essay, and recommendations enough to overlook the fact that my undergraduate academic performance was, how shall I say this....eclectic. I just have to wait and see if they actually get my off the beaten path career goals and understand why I need an MBA now (and not 4 years ago). I can only wait and see if they get me and if they do get me if they like me.

Charge It to the Game

Ladies and Gentlemen, the Brain Dump has gone viral. I logged into my Sitemeter account today and saw an astronomical upswing in my traffic, courtesy of some blog by a person named Roosh. Seems as though someone found this older post and put it on his site and the name calling commenced. At first I ignored it, but when people feel the need to call me nasty names ON MY BLOG then all bets are off.

Forethought

I started to consider getting my MBA late last summer. I knew that I needed to take the GMAT and write a ton of essays in order to apply.  I thought that I could study for my GMAT, take the test, and apply to 6-8 schools between September and January.  Oh, how naive I was! Thank God my promotion last fall kept me from trying to exercise that delusion.
Thanks to a 10% pay increase, better title, and cross country move to the East coast, I got a whole year to prepare for the Fall 2012 admissions cycle. It is quickly becoming apparent that I underestimated how short a year really is. As Round 1 deadlines quickly approach and the weekends on my calendar get reserved I am wishing I had used the extra time to prepare better.

Don't Call Me

I would like to take a break from all of the b-school talk to discuss something that's been on my mind lately...

About a month ago I was driving home from New York when a voice came through my car radio speakers. It was a woman over a telephone line, but I couldn't make out her words. The strains of a synthesizer phased onto the track, followed shortly by a pulsing bass line. A spark of recognition flashed in my mind. I knew this song. I turned up the volume ready to enjoy a song that I didn't know at all but knew that I liked.

I recognized Drake's slightly nasal tenor from the first note he sang. "Cups of the Rose/_____ in my old phone" he sings. Aahh, Drizzy doing his annual vulnerable thug posturing. Unlike previous listens I made a point to pay attention to his sensitive lyrics this time. I reclined in my seat, swayed to the syncopated drum beat, and vibed to his words. Then I heard it.

Too Through

I have yet to apply to any schools, but I'm so done with b-school. I'm done with MBA Fairs, school information sessions, diversity weekends, resumes, essays, recommendations, EVERYTHING. Every MBA panel I've heard always says the same thing: "Enjoy this journey."
Well, if you want my opinion, this journey is nucking futs and there's really nothing enjoyable about it. There's nothing enjoyable about having to give my "Why MBA" pitch whenever I just want some information about what a current student likes about their school. There's nothing fun about wild swings from self assurance that you just might get in everywhere to paranoia that you won't get in anywhere. There's not a damn thing enjoyable about standing on line in 3-4 inch heels waiting for the freakin college senior in front of you to run out of ways to ask an admissions officer, "So what are my chances of getting in?" And most of all, writing essays sucks!! Screw the platitudes about being grateful for all the introspection. Introspection can kiss my ass when it won't fit in 600 words.

It Ain't My Fault

I spent this past weekend in New York City. Although my all consuming need to live in NYC has subsided in recent years, it's still my happy place. A certain calm envelops me as soon as the crackles of static give way to the clear sound of Hot 97 DJ Funkmaster Flex's voice over my car radio speakers. Even without concrete plans for a Friday night the promise of possibilities always hovers in the air. I get excited knowing not that something exciting will happen but that at any moment it could. Mostly, I just like being in the same place where most of the characters from the collegiate chapter of my life reside.

I ran into one of those characters at brunch last Sunday. She was a class behind me at college and I really didn't know her well while I was in school. Actually, I don't remember even crossing her path once during my four year tenure, which says a lot since all of the black students at school could fit in three long tables at the dining hall. While we didn't socialize in the same circle (within an already tiny bubble), we both had the good sense to pledge the greater than great, grander than grand, best of the best sorority in the land. I did it in Spring 2001 so thus I had the pleasure of getting to know her when she followed in Spring 2003.

What do you Recommend?

It's hot. The Weather Channel says that it's 97 degrees right now and that temperatures will reach 102 by the afternoon. People are being warned to avoid outdoor activities between the hours of 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., lest they want to die. Still, I'm sitting in my air conditioned office thinking to myself that I'd rather go for a 10 mile run at noon than confront what faces me next week.

July is coming to an end and August is drawing near. August brings the release of the LIVE APPLICATION. Although essay questions are released between May and July, business schools don't open the floodgates for thousands of applications to pour through until early August. Round 1 applications won't be due until October, but now is the time to start assembling the pieces. While it's up to each individual applicant to get the the online app filled in, the essays written, the GMAT taken, and the transcripts uploaded there is one critical component that is out of our hands. The recommendations, the part of the application where one to three people corroborate that you are in fact the innovative, collaborative, genius business leader of the future that you've said you are. Recommendations, the one section of the application where someone else can sink your battleship (and sink it hard). Recommendations, the reason for fifty-leven rounds of the always fun "Did you submit it yet?" game. Next week I ask my current manager to be one of my business school recommenders.

There's No Place Like Home

I hate mornings. Let me clarify. I hate weekday mornings. Mornings suck from Monday through Friday. Why? Because weekday mornings mean going to work. Going to work requires taking a shower, wearing pants (or an appropriate length skirt or dress), and making my hair presentable. Going to work requires enduring 40-60 minutes of traffic just to be there. Being there requires staying awake for at least 8 hours, reflexively looking over my shoulder to see if a senior manager is about to catch me on facebook or GMAT Club, and refraining from inappropriate scratching. I have absolutely no desire to be at work.
I have a pretty cool job. I represent great brands, work with (mostly) cool people, and manage to get a free lunch a couple of times a week. The job isn't the problem; going to work is. For five years I had a job that rarely required me to go to work. Nearly everyday I rolled out of bed between 8:30 and 9 a.m., bypassed the shower, staggered downstairs, plopped myself in front of the TV with my laptop perched on my knees, and got to working. I would go for a mid-morning run, take an afternoon nap, and polish off my project list in enough time to take a shower and head to the gym or tae kwon do class. It's been two years since I left that position and I have yet to acclimate.
When animals are left in the wild too long it is impossible to domesticate them. I think the same principle applies to people who have worked from home for longer than three years. At three years people reach a point of no return. Just like that wild animal can't be domesticated, the home based employee can't be office broken. We've been free to roam for too long to be caged by the rules of office etiquette. Why is it necessary to wear shoes? Do my feet really need to stay under my desk? What's wrong with putting my head down for an hour long nap? Why can't I release into the atmosphere the gas that bubbles in my stomach? Is it really a big deal to eat the food in the refrigerator that doesn't have my name on it? For some reason that I can't quite grasp all of the behaviors that were perfectly acceptable at my house are not only frowned upon, but prohibited in the office.
What puts the cherry on top of this shit drenched sundae is having to willingly take myself to this place each morning. Regardless of whether or not I have meetings to attend or assignments to complete I have to be here every MORNING. For some reason it's necessary for me to be in the office by 8:30 a.m. No one talks to me. Hardly anyone calls. Still, it's imperative for me to be sitting here. I force myself to wake up by 7 a.m. (even in the dead of winter when mother nature hasn't bothered to awaken the sun), rack my brain to remember if I've worn that particular sweater vest in the last 7 days, refrain from throwing objects at the car in front of me that insists on going 20 in a 45 along a ten mile single lane road, and spend a small fortune on Wawa coffee just to sit here. Ironically, sitting here is NOT necessary for me to do my job. Because of the wunderkinds in the IT department I could stay in bed and still do my job. What's the sense of having remote capabilities if they're not going to let me work remotely?
Like I said, I have no problem actually doing my job. I just don't want to do it in an office. I can do this job just as well in a t-shirt and underoos from the comfort of my queen size bed while watching One Life to Live. Somebody, anybody please...JUST GIVE ME FREE!!