Saturday, October 29, 2005

Cruel To Be Kind

I whole heartedly believe that no woman can change a man, unless he is in diapers. There is no way to make him do anything he ultimately does not want to do. No amount of begging, pleading, reasoning, bargaining, cajoling, whining, nagging, and harassing is going to produce the desired effect. All a man will do is grunt, scratch, and nod his head in agreement before going right back to doing the same damn thing he was doing prior to the ranting and raving: NOTHING! This is extremely frustrating even for the most laid back woman. The more we try, the less they change. It's worse than beating your head against the proverbial brick wall. However, there is a strategy that concussion prone women world wide have begun to employ to stop the madness. So I'm gonna let the rest of you women who are not so quick in on a little secret. Are you alone? Come closer, we don't want the opposite species in on our secret. Okay, here it is. The most effective way to get what you want out of a man is to do nothing.
Yeah, I know it sounds stupid, but I swear it works. It seems to be a rule of inverse relationships. There is a direct equal and opposite correlation between the amount of attention a woman gives a man and the amount of attention she gets in return. The more we call, IM, email, write, and try to spend time with them, the busier and more neglectful they are. And usually this causes us to to increase our efforts 100 fold just to get a 1% increase from the man. I dare you to try something new. Don't call him. Don't go see him. Don't do anything. All of a sudden something amazing will happen. He'll remember you exist, the second you pretend that he doesn't.
It's sad but true, in order to make a man do something he wasn't doing, he basically needs to be treated like shit. When we act like we don't want them or at least act indifferent they are in full on pursuit mode. The moment we acquiesce and return the attention and interest a man goes colder than a shower after someone flushes the toilet. Now, logically, it would seem that when someone returns our affection it would cause us to like them more. Not so with the dingaling species. They actually like it when a woman doesn't want them. So in order for women to succeed under these circumstances we must never like him too much.
I've got a real world example for you. The other day I was talking to my best friend, let's call her Chesty LaRue. So Chesty and I were chatting and she mentions that she's having a lengthy IM conversation with a country bumpkin with whom she used to have relations. For a period of time in their friendship, the country bumpkin wasn't acting right and she was upset that he was devaluing their friendship. When she finally got tired of his bullshit she decided to give him a BDR and his walking papers. Well that did the trick. There's nothing like being told that he sucks in bed to straighten a man out real quick.

1 comment:

radha said...

Men just can't appreciate what they have. It takes being us being a "bitch" or someone else to be a "bitch" for them to fully comprehend our worth.